There are so many benefits of encouraging your child. Sadly as moms it’s very easy to get caught up in the routine of trying to get out the door and through the day that we ultimately lose sight of encouraging our children. It’s not that we don’t know that it’s important but rather we assume our children know that we are proud of them. How sad it must be for them to either not hear the words “I’m proud of you” very often or worst yet, never hear them at all.
Yes, they fight and argue but I wonder how much of that hostility that we feel between siblings isn’t just the result of the hostility that they feel we have towards them. “Hurry up, it’s time to go!”. We want to be proud of our children and not embarrassed by the actions that they choose, especially when we are out in public. So when they goof off and act up or when they say something rude we give them that age old mom look and say “Stop it right now.” Do we smile at them and say “Thank you for making good choices” when they have been on their best behavior long enough for us to walk through the grocery store? Sometimes. Not always.
The Benefits Of Encouraging Your Child
- They smile
Seeing the smile and hearing the laughter of your child is something that sends or should mommy good feelings throughout your entire body. That joy that expresses itself across their face after receiving encouragement from you makes everything in the world seem alright. It’s one of the only ways to know that you are doing a good job at this whole parenthood thing.
- They gain confidence
Oh, do they ever! When you make a habit of being a cheerleader to your child you actually become an inner voice letting them know that they can do whatever it is that they are facing. The opposite is true if you are always speaking negatively to them. You might not even realize that you are doing it. “Stop it! Sit down! No. Don’t! Watch out!” It’s not that saying those things to your children are wrong, we need to be balanced in all aspects of life. Yet, we should desire to be a cheerleader for our children. “Look at you! Wow! It’s okay. You can do it. I’m watching”.
- You speak life into them
When you instill confidence in your child by becoming that cheerleader you are setting the foundations for a happier life. They know that you are proud of them and they will desire to keep that. Even when they are teenagers, they won’t want to loose that trust that you have in them. This will steer them in a direction that not only keeps them desiring better things for their lives but they will have the confidence that what they desire is possible because you believe it is possible.
- They gain the respect of others
When a parent has confidence in their child and is constantly encouraging their child than others around them, even adults will begin to see value in the life of that child. This is vital. Sadly many children grow up without this.
- You’ll feel happier
A dear friend of mine and author of Empowered Birth: Becoming Fearless in Labor once said that the words in which we speak become life. When you speak positive things you’ll feel happier.
Simple Ways To Begin Encouraging Your Child Today
- Tell them what they are good at
I’ve started making this a car time practice of mine. That just simply means that as we are driving down the road I’ll look in the rearview mirror to my children and say something along the line of “you sure are a great listener.” or “you do such a great job at helping others.”
- Let them know that you appreciate them
A thank you goes a long way in life. Let the kids know that you are thankful for them.
- Let then know that you are proud of them
Being appreciative for someone and being proud of them are two different things. “I’m proud of you today, I know sharing that toy wasn’t easy but you did it anyways.”
- Be excited for their accomplishes, no matter how small.
This is that cheerleader concept. “Wow! You did it!” Even if it’s jumping over a log our kids should hear us praise them for their accomplishes.
It’s not always my first nature to do these things. I often want to tell my children to watch out but as they are growing up I’m discovering that it’s not fair to them for me to pass my anxiety and fears to them. I don’t want them to carry my burdens on their shoulders, I want them to believe that they can fly.