Fighting During The Holidays
She sat in the passenger seat of his two door car. It used to be that excitement filled her heart when she sat there. Tonight, anger is the only emotion that she feels. Maybe a slight sense of hurt but as far as he knows there is only anger. It seems that they have been fighting for days.
He didn’t open the car door to let her in this time, she didn’t give him the chance. When he cranked the car his favorite rock station was blasting loud enough for the entire neighbor hood to hear it. She immediately turned it down, no way was he going to escape the conversation that easily. They needed to discuss this.
Thirty minutes into the drive to his mother’s house he hadn’t spoken a word. She repeatitly tapped her black leather boots on the bottom on the dashboard in front of her, a clear warning for anyone who knew this hot head, she always tapped her foot when she was mad. She secretly plotted her revenge while during so.
The young couple had only been married eight months and this was supposed to be the happiest time of the year for them, but so far all they had done was fight. The fighting started on Halloween, but that was just a minor setback, nothing too major. She wanted to dress up and go out, he had wanted to stay in because he was exhausted.
But a new argument arose on Thanksgiving when both his family and her family held their family gatherings at the same time. She didn’t get the chance to see her family at all. Her brother’s wife was about to have a baby at the time and she had wanted to see her before the baby was born.
Yes, his family was less than an hour away but had she known moving four hours away from her mom and dad would have been an issue during the holidays, she would have reconsidered transferring her job to be near his work. He could have just as easily moved closer to her and her family. They already saw his family more often through out the year, the least he could do was let her see her family for the holidays. Didn’t he know it was breaking her heart? Didn’t he care?
Here it was, their first Christmas Eve together and nothing magical was in the air, actually the air was so thick between them that it felt like the first person to utter a word would be cut down with a sword of the tongue. No way was she going to cave.
Do you and your husband fight during the holidays?
Often times the reason is simple. Before getting married you and your spouse may have thought to talk about major issues such as sex and money, after all you have been told that those are the issues couples most fight about.
What You Didn’t Talk About
Perhaps, you just assumed that your holiday traditions were similar to your husband’s and that you shared the same level of love for the holidays. Not until marriage do you see that the traditions you hold dear to your heart contradict the ones that your spouse knows as sentimental.
Monday Marriage Challenge:
Discuss the holidays.
Ask your spouse what his favorite memory of Christmas was as a child. Find out if there is family tradition that he would like to pass down to his kids. Open up the discussion now so that there is no fighting during the holidays.